Did you know that 1 out of 5 people will experience squirrel rape on their lifetime?

Squirrel rape is no laughing matter, but THE GREAT OUTDOORSMAN is here to help with these 5 tips on avoiding squirrel rape.

1. Always wear a helmet when you leave the house.

2. Never have direct eye contact with a squirrel.

3. Always stuff something up your ass before you leave the house, the bigger the better ( items up your ass can help block the penetration of squirrel dong).

4. Stay sharp.

5. Cut down all the trees in your yard.