I HAVE A BAD FEELING THAT THE ONLY WAY TO GET THROUGH THE PEARLY GATES IS BY GIVING SAINT PETER A KILLER BJ!

This is really going to suck! Standing in line for years as you wait to get up to the Pearly Gates. Then when you finally get there, you have to give Saint Peter a killer BJ?!?!?!

I’m fucking bladder shy, I doubt I could give a killer bj with millions of people watching! And let’s just say I could give a killer bj, what if Saint Peter just got-off from the BJ-er before me? It would be nearly impossible to have Mr. Peter climax, it takes awhile for the ball sack to reload…. I’d be sucking for hours!

The whole ‘getting into heaven system’ is rigged. I don’t want to suck someone’s dick for hours in front of someone, then be casted to hell.

  • It would be the twist no one saw coming.

  • Steve

    Bulgingsnake: Master Theologian.

    • Bulgingsnake

      Always have been

  • Andronymous

    Why else would he be called Saint Peter?! While you are “praying”, he will store the pack of pickled peppers he picked in your pooper too!

    • Bulgingsnake

      You got that right!

  • That’s why the line is so long!! And that’s why he is Saint Peter… I’m not too worried, though. Never had any complaints…

    X”D

    • thereforeiam

      Do you come here often? Can I buy you a drink? Hows about a ride in my big shiny car?

  • thereforeiam

    You got it in you Sam. Bring it home big guy and you are in.

  • MIA711

    $20 bucks says ya will 😉