Fin and I decided to pump iron like heterosexual gym bros today. We barely started lifting weights when a horrible thing happened . Out of the blue, I get an awful stomach ache. It was a harbinger of the pain that was to come. Like a blood red comet in the sky. But instead of a comet, it is my flaming anus from the sandpaper found in the public toilet.

I had to make multiple trips to the restroom.  All never ebdibg stories of misery. I suffered a very bad case of  mysterious green apple spalters… Needless to say,  the whole workout was ruined.