Police were called on an unidentified man who was repeatedly masturbating in Burger King.
One of restaurant employees who witnessed the event told police that the man kept entering and exiting the restaurant, and when he’d get inside, he would begin masturbating.
The witness also told police Steve’s genitals were fully exposed.
When officers arrived on the scene and tried to speak with the suspect, they said he appeared to be intoxicated and wouldn’t speak to them. He only would look at his shoulder and yell “Shut up bitch!”
The suspect was able to overtake the police and steal their squad car. Citizens of whatever state are warned to be on the lookout for a cop car full of Jameson bottles and snakes. There may be a dog driving the car.