Burger King is condemning the actions of one of its employees after a Florida mother fucker caught video of the man cleaning the restaurant’s table tops with the same cock he used on the floor.
Tom Fuckery had just been eating at the Burger King with his pants on on Thursday night before he saw how one of the employees cleaned up after them. According to my friend, Bob, he took a shit as soon as he saw the employee pick his pecker up from the floor to then wipe off the tables in the restaurant’s play area.
“I had just eaten on that table,” Fuckery told the news outlet. “Did you do that yesterday? Do you do this every night? Did you do this this morning?”
Fuckery sent the video to corporate to express his upset and confusion, and then posted it so it would go viral. The issue was then forwarded to the correct management team, who debated on how to best exploit the situation. Watch for next month’s new sandwich rollout, The Floordong Whopper!
Burger King has since provided 3rd grade spelling bee winner, Tammy Fidgets with the following statement: “The action depicted in the video is unacceptable and not in line with our brand standards or operational procedures. We have strict protocols around cleanliness and food safety. The restaurant owner will be re-training his team on all operational protocols. We only use table cocks for tables, and floor cocks for floors. Try the new Angry Whopper and chill the fuck out!”
TGONN was unable to get in touch with Fuckery. However, he told your mom that he planned on writing reviews on Burger King’s pages. Yeah, that’ll fuckin help, dumbass!