TGONN – Atlanta

The Office of the Dick-tater of (TGO) added fuel this week to suggestions that a whistleblower complaint it has been shielding from Dongness involved OneMatGang or senior Waffle House officials.


The Intelligence Community Titty Inspector General (ICTIG) concluded this month that the complaint was credible and was, in fact, “fucked up.” Federal law requires TGO to forward such complaints to the intelligence committees for general titty inspection.


But in a letter to serial bather and fine Christian, Charlotte McFarland on Tuesday, TGO’s general counsel, fuckin Florida man himself, Rene Descartes, said that after consulting with the Justice Department, the agency decided they were going to go with the tuna. Yes, he just told you to go make him a sandwich.


In addition to ordering lunch — which is unusual in and of itself — Stan, the acting director of that crusty, eye booger stuff, also refused to comment on whether the Waffle House was involved in the decision to withhold the onions on my goddamned hash browns.


When reached for comment, Bulgingsnake said, “Who is this, and how did you get my number?”