Mighty Moose: A Biography Part 3

Mighty Moose was world renowned for his piano skills. He spent years as a session player in the studio system, but was never really able to break out and make it big on his own. He almost got to be the piano player in the band Boston in 1978, but Tom Scholtz thought that the Moose’s style didn’t fit with the band’s image.

This decision sent the Mighty Moose into a crippling depression. He lived on a diet of meth and the tiny pink erasers on the bottom of pencils for 6 years. You know how many small pencil erasers it takes to ease a Mighty Moose’s hunger? A lot. On some days it would take more than two hundred packs of pencils to fill him. Each pack probably would’ve had anywhere from 12 to 20 pencils in them. That caused Mighty Moose to burn through almost all his savings.

Finally, John Amos, who played the dad in Good Times came to check in on his neighbor Mighty Moose. This is exactly what he said.

“Mighty Moose, your predicament reminds me of when I got fired from Good Times because I thought the J.J. character’s idiocy was starting to dominate the show rather than tell a story about the inner workings of a poor black family. I was pretty young when I got cast in that show even though I was playing a dad. That’s how I’m still somehow alive in 2020. If I was 50 when the show started that would that would make me 96 in 2020 so I’d think I’d probably be dead by 2004 or 5. I honestly can’t think of another 70s TV dad that’s alive. Did you know that show was a spinoff of Maude? My character’s wife Florida was Maude’s housekeeper and my name was Henry on that show, but for some reason they decided to change it to James when they gave us a spinoff and that fucked the continuity up right from the get-go. Anyways, I’m going to go do a guest spot on Hardcastle and McCormick, so I hope you feel better”

That was when Mighty Moose realized that he couldn’t possibly play piano, his hooves were too big.

To be continued….